“I’m fine” is one of the most common phrases. But after “I read and agree to all the terms and conditions,” “I’m fine” may be the least honest of them all. Maybe more than a lie, it’s a shield.
“I’m fine” often means:
- I don’t want to burden anyone.
- I am not sure how to explain how I am feeling.
- I don’t have the energy to explain it.
- If I start talking, it might become a rant.
Overwhelm doesn’t always look like tears or panic. It can manifest as irritability, shutting down, procrastination, forgetfulness, or emotional numbness. It can also be constant fatigue (even with 7-8 hours of sleep), difficulty concentrating, or snapping at the little things.
When your nervous system is overloaded, your body shifts to survival mode. In survival mode, clarity and/or communication becomes difficult. Think about how you feel after running a marathon. Being overwhelmed is like chronically staying in the post-marathon fatigue.
It may be hard to elaborate on the “I’m fine.” Now it may be an automatic response. Try a check-in first:
- How am I actually feeling right now?
- What feels like it’s too much or heavy?
- What do I need more/less of?
You don’t have to drop the shield to everyone, but being honest with yourself is the first step to being able to lower the shield and towards relief.
About Uma Kumar:
Uma understands that seeking therapy is difficult, and on top of that, finding the right therapist by reading numerous profiles is a daunting task. She aims to meet the client where they are and create a supportive environment where they feel heard and comfortable discussing their experiences, needs, and goals.
Uma is a Resident in Counseling offering both virtual and in-person services at our Alexandria location. Uma has worked with a diverse population, including children, young adults, and the elderly, addressing issues such as anxiety, depression, adjusting to life transitions, multicultural difficulties, bipolar disorder, ADHD, school and employment stress, and various physical disabilities. To learn more about Uma, visit HERE.