You need it.
The first time I heard about this book was on Good Morning America. I go through phases where I like to have the morning news on in the background as I drink my coffee and begin working through yesterday’s documentation. This day, Nedra appeared for a few short minutes to speak on her newly published book: Set Boundaries, Find Peace. Something about her infectious energy, palpable through the screen, stopped me from typing and captured my attention as she introduced her work. About halfway through those brief 3 minutes, I had already logged into Amazon and put the book in my cart to pre-order, thirsty for more of what she had to share.
I love boundaries. I love guiding my clients on how to identify them, set them, and enforce them. Teaching my clients about the flexible and inflexible areas, how boundaries can be internal and external, and the assertive communication style that is necessary to begin applying them effectively.
I have read through this guide week by week with a couple of my clients. I have also recommended it to several others, along with some of my personal friends. If you are looking for a comprehensive yet simple read on the art of boundaries, this book is it. Nedra’s thoughtful organization of the book begins with some educational pieces on types of boundaries as well as how they shape our relationships with the world around us. She then moves on to an application section. Nedra highlights different areas of your life (work, family, romance, etc.) where boundaries may be more challenging. She provides valuable insight on how to navigate the myriad of ways people may respond to these new boundaries.
Your journey to creating healthy boundaries will take time.
Every chapter is packed with conversation starters, concrete examples, and other tools that will aid you on your journey to create healthy boundaries. My favorite part of the book are the plentiful and diverse prompts she provides to fill your arsenal as you face both internal and external sources of resistance, guilt, and fear on your way. Not to mention, there is a self-assessment quiz in the back. It will help you gauge where you fall on the spectrum of porous, healthy, and rigid boundaries.
This is not a book that makes false promises, but rather boasts empathetic honesty. Nedra does not shy away from the fact that setting boundaries can be hard. She also firmly reminds you they are absolutely vital to a fulfilling life. The author empowers you to take these tools and begin putting them to work in your life. Setting healthy boundaries will shape your relationships with other people and situations in a way that honors what you need.
If this isn’t on your list for 2022 yet, I hope you’ll consider it now! Happy reading.
*Disclaimer: Reading a book won’t change your life. You must absorb the knowledge, practice the skills, and put in the work to make adjustments in your life. Bring your thoughts, fears, and reflections on what you’re reading into the therapy space. You don’t have to navigate them alone.
About Jasmine Payne:
Jasmine is a Resident in Counseling and provides services at the Fredericksburg location. She is a two-time graduate of Longwood University, receiving her B.S. in Psychology along with an M.S. in Clinical Mental Health Counseling.
Throughout her graduate studies, Jasmine worked with teens and adults who belonged to various minority and multicultural populations. She also has familiarity with a wide spectrum of mental health concerns including anxiety/depression, grief, moodiness, self-improvement, motivation, relationship issues, and many more. To learn more about Jasmine, visit HERE.