In the midst of winter, I found there was, within me, an invincible summer ~ Albert Camus Healing is a complex process that involves physical, emotional, and spiritual aspects. The process of healing may differ depending on the individual and the specific condition or ailment being treated, but there are some general principles that can [...]
Author: Healthy Minds Therapy
10 Black Pioneers in the Mental Health Field
Throughout Black History Month, our nation honors African Americans who have made great contributions to our country. Healthy Minds Therapy would like to take the opportunity to highlight Black pioneers in the mental health field who have made significant contributions to the treatment of mental illness and addiction this month. 10 Black Mental Health Professionals [...]
Self-Care Exercises
What is self-care and why is it important? Self-care means taking care of oneself by engaging in activities that promote wellness. These areas of wellness include emotional, physical, mental, social, spiritual, practical, and professional well-being. It is crucial that you address each of these areas to better cope with various stressors and find balance in [...]
Thinking Better and Avoiding Mind Traps
An important first step in changing how we think and developing the ability to recognize our distorted thinking is by developing an awareness of common “Mind Traps”. Mind traps are often a byproduct of our inner self-talk, but it is important to note that without some sort of “fact-checking” our inner self-talk is not always [...]
On Saying Yes
Self care is all the rage and, in most articles, memes, and TikTok advice it’s all about saying no to things. That is something that is a challenge for many of us, and saying no is an important skill. That said, so is saying yes. When was the last time you said yes to something? [...]
How to be an Ally During Pride Month and Throughout the Year
The month of June is an important month dedicated to the uplifting of LGBTQ+ voices, a celebration of LGBTQ+ culture and the support of LGBTQ+ rights. PRIDE is an acronym for Personal Rights in Defense and Education. No matter who you love or how you identify, everyone deserves to be safe, valued, equal, and proud. [...]
Sometimes It’s Not Just One Thing That Can Help Us Maintain our Healing
Over the past few years, it has been both a personal and professional observation that the people who have been successful on their mental health wellness path utilize many different coping strategies and coping skills. Often, I think we all sometimes, in one form or another, look for the “quick fix” or the one thing [...]
The Productivity Paradox
How many times have you found yourself with a canceled appointment and you frantically looked for something to do to fill that space? We’ve all been there. Not wanting to waste a single moment of possible productivity. Somewhere along the way we’ve managed to attach our happiness and success to our productivity. This has resulted [...]
Tips on Self-Care
How to add Self-Care to your daily routine. As the saying goes, "an empty tank will take you exactly nowhere. Take time to refuel." Self-care is not selfish so erase that concept from your mind. If anything, it benefits not only you but those who are around you. You cannot properly care for others [...]
No Show or Show Up?
Your First Counseling Session: Trying something new for the first time can cause quite a bit of anxiety. I felt pretty anxious before I went to my first barre class (you know, that trendy exercise fad right now combining Pilates, yoga and ballet?). I imagine this is what it feels like to start therapy for [...]
Remember Your Why
By Jennifer Drum, Resident in Counseling I was recently inspired by a client who carries a list she created to remind herself why she is committed to her job, even on the very tough days… People enter therapy for many different reasons, and it is truly a process unique to the individual. Addressing challenges and [...]
A Mental Health Take-Away from “March Madness”
By Jennifer Drum, Resident in Counseling Intensions and Uncertainty If you turn on your television over the next few weeks you can enjoy the physical, emotional, and psychological ride of college athletics through “March Madness.” In the spirit of these student-athletes, let's take a moment to feel into their reality of uncertainty when it comes [...]
Intention setting: a better way to start the day
How often do you hit the snooze on your alarm and rush through your morning routine when you finally get out of bed? Maybe you do get up when your alarm goes off the first time, but you immediately start thinking of the many things on your to-do list for the day. Either way, we [...]
What is Social Work Anyway?
When I decided to go back to school later in life to pursue social work, I soon realized how many misconceptions there are around what social workers do. Many people assumed social workers’ only role was doing child protective work, which is no surprise since that is often how social workers are portrayed in the [...]
I Think My Child is Having Mental Health Issues – Now What?
Parenting is not for the faint of heart Parenting a child during their middle and high school years can present unique challenges in normal times. Throw in a global pandemic, social justice reckoning, climate change (insert your kiddo’s stressor) and it certainly doesn’t get any easier. If you are the parent of a tween or [...]
Trusting the Therapy Process
By Jennifer Drum, Resident in Counseling Therapy is an involved process. The first step being, entering into a therapeutic relationship where you feel seen and heard, as well as open to looking at yourself and life in a deeper way. Some personal challenges are going to take longer to sift through. Some issues, after being addressed, may [...]
A Message to Men in Need
“To progress again, man must remake himself. And he cannot remake himself without suffering. For he is both the marble and the sculptor. In order to uncover his true visage, he must shatter his own substance with heavy blows of his hammer.” ~Alexis Carrel, Man, The Unknown Look the reality is; though most of us [...]
5 Tips for Improved Mindfulness Walking in 2022
IT TOOK A STORM TO HELP ME BE PRESENT! Walking for 50 minutes at the end of each day is routine for me. I lace up, insert my Air Pods, select a playlist, and off I go. I pass dogs on leashes, food delivery people, kids on the playground… I think you get the picture. [...]
The Holidays as an Opportunity to Grow
By Jennifer Drum, Resident in Counseling This time of year is as emotionally colorful as the lights we see in store windows. Holidays, like other yearly marked events, offer us an opportunity to look inside our hearts to see where we have arrived as of now. We may find ourselves not just reflecting on ourselves but also [...]
Fears About the Future and Anticipatory Anxiety
Anticipatory anxiety is the worry that creeps in when there are uncertainties about the future. We often become focused on the things we can’t predict or even make sense of. In that space, our minds begin to entertain the negative possibilities and “what ifs”. This type of anxiety can be seen in our everyday lives [...]
Using Your Anxiety as A Trigger for Taking Action
What is to give light must endure burning. Everything can be taken from a man or a woman but one thing: the last of human freedoms to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way. ~ Viktor Frankl; Man’s Search for Meaning For many people today, anxiety is typically [...]
Navigating Grief During the Holidays
The holiday season can be a very difficult time for anyone experiencing grief and loss. This may be the first family gathering without a loved one present. It may also be years since the loss of a loved one as the pain connected to grief continues to ebb and flow. The holidays can also be [...]
Grieving the Loss of a Pet
The loss of someone you care deeply for can feel absolutely devastating. The same goes for the death of a cat, dog, or any other pet you may have. The experiences and feelings we have with our pets are unique to our relationship with them. There is no one else that has experienced that relationship [...]
The Value of Exploring Our Experiences Using More Curiosity and Less Judgment
Shifting a judgmental mindset. An essential component in my approach to therapy involves assisting clients to see things clearly, rather than in a biased, judgmental way. Our judging minds typically conceal a wider, more realistic picture of our life experiences, ourselves, and of others. This skewed inaccurate view often results in our emotional suffering in [...]
Break Through Resistance
It happens to all of us. We make a commitment to change, and then, resistance hits. Unexpected barriers, that we don’t know how to deal with, can be one of the biggest reasons that we don’t achieve our goals. Resistance can easily discourage us and give us reasons not to change. For some people, resistance [...]
Sleep Hygiene
Sleep. We love it, we hate it. It can be a source of rest, but also a source of stress. When 50-70 million people in the United States suffer from a diagnosable sleep disorder, it’s clear that it is a prevalent issue. It affects our physical, mental, and emotional health. Just like you brush your [...]
Getting Un-Stuck
Change is scary, but acknowledging that you have the power to choose something different, may be even scarier. We can all at some point in our lives become paralyzed by fear, anxiety, worry, and disappointment. But, to get unstuck we have to choose change; we can't wait for it to happen. We have to get [...]
Common Holiday Relapse Triggers
As we approach the holiday season, there is a shift in the world as we enter what is typically considered a wonderful and joyous time of the year. Unfortunately, amidst all this joy and merriment there can also be increased stress. This stress can stem from the financial burden of giving gifts, entertaining company, or [...]
Understanding HALT – How to Engage in Positive Behaviors
When we are aware of our mental, emotional, and physical states this can lead to us engaging in positive behaviors rather than impulsive behaviors. If we HALT and assess our needs then we are better able to address behaviors before they lead to relapse, whether that is returning to substance use or other behaviors we [...]
Decision Making in a Pandemic: Doing The “Right” Thing
Some of us are more risk-averse than others, and some of us love adventure and trying new things. Risk-taking sounds like a bad thing, but it is really just a fancy way of describing adventurousness and courage. Risk-taking is impacted by a lot of individual factors, like age, life experience, and perception. So those of [...]
Thoughts on Empathy
Recently a friend who was in the process of moving was telling me how stressful it was for her. This led me to reflect on my own stressful experiences with moving. Looking back on how I responded to her, I realize that I became so caught up in my own thoughts that I did not [...]
The Myth About Mindfulness
Mindfulness... it doesn't work. This is a common concern I hear from clients, and it usually includes a recent story about how breathing didn't help calm them down when they were in the midst of a panic attack. Of course it didn't work. Mindfulness is an incredible tool, but it's not the only useful coping [...]
8 Ways to Support College Students at Midterms
If you are a parent who helped your student settle into their college dorm room this past August, these last few months you’ve likely experienced your home to be slightly quieter, your laundry a bit lighter, and family meals somewhat smaller. 8-10 weeks ago, college students returned to campus, filling dorms, classrooms, and dining halls, bringing [...]
Three Ways to Improve your Mood
Up to 40% of our mood can be determined by our daily actions. This research finding is good news. It means that we can have a significant impact on improving our mood. If you are looking for some ways to beat a bad mood, try some of the strategies below. Guard your sleep Sleep deprivation [...]
There is No Such Thing as Happiness (As We Commonly Know it)
“There is no such thing as happiness. Life bends joy and pain, beauty and ugliness, in such a way that no one may isolate them.” ~ Jean Toomer, Cane What is happiness and what does it really mean to find happiness? Is it even possible? I have always found it interesting both in my personal and [...]
Thoughts on Slowing Down when Overwhelmed
As we near the end of summer there is a dampening of the energy that was here earlier in the year. People are experiencing transitions in their lives as they return to working onsite, as they distance, again, and as they experience other changes in their lives including returning to school. With these, there can [...]
What are Behavioral Addictions?
Behavioral Addictions, also known as process addictions, exist outside of the world of drug and alcohol use. As defined by the National Institute of Health (NIH), behavioral addiction is a compulsion to continually engage in an activity or behavior despite the negative impact on the person’s ability to remain mentally and/or physically healthy and functional [...]
Stress Management: Progressive Muscle Relaxation
Progressive Muscle Relaxation is an incredible skill to help manage stress, anxiety, panic, and any unpleasant feeling. It’s also great if you just want to relax! It’s a great way to ground your mind AND your body and can be done anywhere. How It Works You can either find a guided progressive muscle relaxation exercise [...]
How to Get Over Fear
We all experience fear. Whether it is fear of failure, fear of success, fear of being alone, fear of not being perfect or even being fearful of our emotions, fear can really get the best of us and make us feel alone, small, and dampen our ability to share our unique gifts with others. But, [...]
Family Dynamics in Addiction
Addiction does not only affect the person within their addiction it also affects the entire family. In a family, each member has a specific role for the family to function and maintain stability. When there is one person or multiple people in a family who are addicted to alcohol or other drugs, the family roles [...]
Progress in Therapy: From Stagnation to Mobility
Progress with therapy looks different for everyone. It may look like a reduction in panic attacks and anxiety levels, light after never-ending darkness linked to tragedy and grief, a respite from the clutches of depression, or learning the self-advocacy and communication skills that create peaceful resolutions following years of conflict with a loved one. Progress [...]
Weeds in a Neighbor’s Yard
There is an invasive weed in the neighbor’s yard, and I wanted to say something about it. I even thought of going over there and offering to help pull the weeds but was reminded that it was not for me to pull the weeds in the neighbor’s yard. I will let them continue to work [...]
A Brief Introduction to Attachment
Let’s face it, humans need to be in close connection with others. We all possess a basic need to form close bonds throughout our lives. This need is so embedded in our biology. We are equipped with a system to manage our relationships with caregivers, partners, and children. This is known as our attachment system. [...]
Three Ways to Improve your Mood
You’re doing the therapy thing but still feel some lingering depressive symptoms. Or perhaps, you just can’t seem to fit therapy into your calendar or budget but want to kick the familiar pings of overwhelm and exhaustion that are surfacing again. Whatever the reasons, if you are feeling a bit more run down and want [...]
How to Deal with Transition
With summer in full swing and the “hopeful” end to a global pandemic on the horizon, we are experiencing transitions of all kinds. Spending more time out, moving, starting a new job, entering higher education, engagements, weddings, having a baby, becoming an empty nester… All of these transitions can be exciting, scary, sad, and any [...]
No Drama Discipline
Parenting the 'Whole-Brain' way to calm the chaos and nurture your child’s developing mind Every year when the weather gets warmer, my bookshelf gets a bit fuller. I admit; I am a bit of a nerd and love relaxing with a good book. This month, I am returning to an oldie but goodie. If you [...]
A Different Perspective on Fear
Fear is very pertinent to most people and many of my clients, especially in this day and age. Fear is a great cause of suffering. It stops us from being healthy, prevents us from being successful, keeps us from developing relationships that are helpful, and stops us from being at peace. But at the same [...]
Tips to Prevent Relapse
Identifying External and Internal Triggers Related to Addiction In early recovery or sobriety, it is important to identify external and internal triggers that may lead to relapse. Relapse is a return to prior behaviors after a period of remission. For example, a relapse is when a person returns to alcohol use after a period without alcohol use. Relapse and the Recovery [...]
Connecting On A Bridge
When you’re crossing a bridge, it is very difficult to avoid coming into contact with others. I found myself on a trail recently where I had to cross a bridge and thought about turning around when I encountered a group. There was worry about my dog who hasn’t been around other dogs in a long [...]
What To Do If Therapy Stalls
You did it. In the sea of various credentials and types of therapy, you found a therapist that you can trust. Everything was great at first. And then…you hit a plateau. Month after month, you just don’t feel like you are making progress. It can be frustrating to feel like you are putting so much [...]
Using a Client’s Passion or Interest as a Therapeutic Tool
Often as therapists, we can find our clients, and ourselves, for that matter, stuck where we are both connected but some emotion or behavior or techniques are bearing no “fruit”. I often find a change in perspective at what my clients are trying to work through is especially useful. Often this is accomplished by “thinking [...]
Substance Use, Abuse, or Addiction: What’s the difference?
In the world of substance use treatment, there are various terms that can become confusing when one begins treatment or are new on their journey of recovery. One area of confusion is understanding the difference between substance use, abuse, and addiction. When a person can define and fully understand what they are experiencing, it can help them in the process of healing [...]
Art-Making and Process
The process of art-making can be multilayered. I am an encaustic artist, which uses wax in the painting process. Painting with wax has allowed me to learn a lot about myself. Attending my first encaustic workshop was very stressful for me. There was a lot of self-doubt about my ability to learn this new painting [...]
Three Relationship Myths That Leave Us Unhappy
What is a happy relationship? The answer is simple, right? Two people meet, share interests, fall in love, and live happily ever after. While this relationship template works well for romantic comedies (who doesn’t love a good RomCom?), it rarely leads to a life of bliss with our partner. It is important to consider our [...]
Thoughts on Self-Compassion
Self-compassion is something that many of us struggle with. We are sometimes hard on ourselves as we strive to do better or live up to expectations that we set for ourselves. It can be a heavyweight to carry. Many years ago, I attended a talk on the Dalai Lama’s book How to Be Compassionate. I [...]
Do I Own My Story or Does My Story Own Me?
When it comes to trauma, we as counselors must assess the trauma narrative continuum, which is the degree to which our clients “own” their stories and to what degree the stories “own” our clients. I learned this concept from a one-time supervisor and now mentor and friend. I found it immediately relatable in my own [...]
Connecting with Your Child
When Emotionally Exhausted Last month marked the one-year anniversary of COVID-related social distancing policies, new schedules, new ways of being in the world, and an abrupt goodbye to pre-pandemic life. There has been an upsurge in hitting the “pandemic wall”—our brains are full and tired and our kids are feeling the weight of boredom. New [...]
Conceptualizations
I have noticed in my work with couples and individuals that people often remain in a state of suffering because of their own conceptualizations. We hold on to things like “it is your fault” or “I am right, and you are wrong” type conceptualizations. This way of being keeps us in a place of feeling [...]
Recognizing Transference
Have you ever had an experience where someone reminds you of a person you have known before and you view and interact with them as you did with that person from your past? If so, you may be experiencing transference. Transference Can Be Positive or Negative Transference occurs when a person directs feelings and experiences [...]
Connecting to Recovery Resources
During the Covid-19 Pandemic Prior to the start of the Covid-19 pandemic, 12 Step Meetings, whether the meeting is Alcoholics Anonymous, Narcotics Anonymous, Cocaine Anonymous, and so on, were usually fairly easy to find. One could find a list of meetings in their area by the day of the week and time on AA.org or NA.org. A person [...]
The Impact of Anxiety and Fear
“Life cannot be lived nor can death be faced without anxiety. Anxiety is a guide as well as an enemy and can point the way to authentic existence. The task of the therapist is to reduce anxiety to comfortable levels and then to use this existing anxiety to increase a patient's awareness and vitality.” ~Irvin [...]
Commonalties in The Therapeutic Process and The Practice of Aikido
A Personal Experience As both Aikido instructor and practitioner, I am often amazed at the commonalities between the practice of Aikido, and the therapeutic process. The objective in Aikido is to join one’s personal ki (energy) with universal ki to achieve harmony (ai). Aikido stresses working with a partner, rather than wrestling or fighting against [...]
The Power of Assertive Communication
One key component of any healthy relationship is communication. And it is important to not just communicate but to communicate effectively. One way to ensure this is done is to use assertive communication techniques. Assertive communication occurs when an individual is able to state their own needs, wants, and feelings directly and confidently, while also [...]
Cultivating Understanding
Like any other useful human trait, understanding must be intentionally cultivated through practice. Understanding does not necessarily mean agreeing with someone. We can have different values than others and respect their point of view. Like any other mindful practice, it must be based on compassion. Compassion for ourselves as well as compassion for others. Compassion is what will allow us to [...]
Three Things to Do for a Life Well Lived
Last year gave all of us the opportunity to tune into what is most important to us as we have wrestled with what it means to navigate our new circumstances and find joy. But what exactly brings us joy? What exactly is a life well-lived, and how can we set ourselves up to be happier [...]
Communication In The Moment
It is important to have communication in the moment or near the moment. Recently, I talked with a friend about an event that occurred many years ago. I didn’t bring it up at that particular moment, but I realized that I had been holding onto this for a very long time. I remember the event [...]
Key to Success in Setting Intentions
I believe the key to success in setting intentions in any area, at any point in our lives, is consistency. Certainly, adjustments in our process may be necessary. Other than small rudder steers from time to time, we need to practice consistency in any endeavor to achieve success. The best way I have heard this [...]
Three Myths About Emotions
Emotions are a central piece of the human experience because they guide many decisions in our lives and many of our reactions to the world around us. But what exactly are emotions? Throughout the decades several thought leaders have attempted to answer this question. Modern neuroscientific advances have deepened our understanding of how the brain [...]
General Observations on The Link Between Clients Managing Their Trauma Background and Navigating a COVID-19 World.
By Bradd Buckingham, Resident in Counseling Since the beginning of COVID-19, I have professionally observed as a counseling intern working in a community mental health clinic, currently as a resident in counseling as well as personally with friends and family, a shift or slide backward in the management of their trauma symptomology and the meaningful [...]
Finding Your Snowflake in this 2020 Blizzard: A Quick Guide to Holiday Grief and Loss
By Diane Bonilla, MA, Licensed Professional Counselor in Northern Virginia The holiday season is upon us and life is marching forward, but for some, your minds and your hearts are standing still, grieving the death of a loved one amidst what feels like an incoming storm. Even if the loss is from the past, holiday time [...]
Key Ingredients for Emotional Connectedness in a Relationship
Dr. Sue Johnson, an expert on couple’s emotional connectedness, created the acronym A.R.E. to describe three ingredients that are needed to create healthy, emotionally satisfying relationships. Relationships that embodied accessibility, responsiveness, and engagement tend to have the highest relationship satisfaction and are characterized by high levels of trust and commitment. What exactly is A.R.E.? “A” [...]
You’ve Got This! Three Holistic Steps to Managing Anxiety
By Diane Bonilla, MA, Licensed Professional Counselor in Northern Virginia The two most important things to understand about anxiety are that it is universally experienced and that it is holistically managed. You are absolutely not alone in experiencing anxiety, though it can feel that way. Anxiety symptoms can impact our emotional, physical and spiritual health. [...]
Our Mental Shortcuts and Bias’ in Decision-Making
By Dr. Debra Rezendes, HMT Resident in Marriage and Family Therapy in Northern Virginia Since the beginning of the pandemic, I have found myself coveting more time to read and learn. I have gleaned much from these conversations and trainings and have found them helpful in considering the various ways in which I may openly [...]
Thoughts on Stressful Conversations
By Jackie Carrera, MSEd, Resident In Counseling in Northern Virginia There are difficult conversations taking place as we experience worry concerning different areas of our lives. A lot has happened during the past six plus months and it has been a stressful time for many of us. I wrote about communication in a previous post [...]
Character Strengths
By Bruce Craig, Resident in Counseling Often in our society we are taught or conditioned to look at our weaknesses and constantly try to improve them. This approach can be limiting and make real growth almost impossible in some situations. This often leads to negative self-talk and a lowered self-esteem. I encourage people to instead, [...]
Mentally Preparing for the Holidays
As we near the end of October, it is natural for couples to begin to discuss holiday plans. Holiday planning can be stressful, but this year has the added stress of the pandemic and COVID-19 concerns. Why do the holidays bring up so much stress? The holidays often include a lot of physical and emotional [...]
Worry and Growth
By Jackie Carrera, MSEd, Resident in Counseling in Northern Virginia I’ve been thinking about the struggles that we have been experiencing during this stay-at-home period. It has been a challenging time and many people are experiencing a lot of worry or fear. I have seen this in the art world, with friends, and hear it [...]
What’s Your “Upside Down” Magic?
This weekend my family watched the movie, “Upside Down Magic,” for movie night. In the movie, a group of young children are deemed misfits because of their “wonky, ” “unorthodox,” and “upside down” magic. When the school gets attacked by “Shadow Magic,” the children must confront the parts of them they once avoided to rediscover [...]
Two Arrows (Emotional Objectivity)
By Bruce Craig, MA, Resident in Counseling in Northern Virginia There is a Buddhist metaphor that I have found to be a great way to think about emotional objectivity. When something difficult happens in life, as can be expected from time to time, we often internalize how we feel about it subjectively. This is where [...]
Keeping It REAL as a Parent!
By Mary Jackson, MSW is a Supervisee in Clinical Social Work in Northern Virginia Parents…this one is for you! Have you ever had one of those days when you feel as if you are going to LOSE IT? Recently I did. It wasn’t just parenting that had me overwhelmed. It was the sum of EVERYTHING. [...]
Cultivating Positive Mental Focus – Part 4
By Bruce Craig, MA, Resident in Counseling in Northern Virginia In everything and everyone we encounter in life there will be aspects we appreciate and aspects we maybe don’t prefer. As we discussed in earlier articles of this series our minds naturally focus on the negative first because this was necessary in some ways for [...]
Art-Making and Mental Health
By Jackie Carrera, MSEd, Resident in Counseling in Northern Virginia Creativity and mental health go hand in hand. I am a visual artist who enjoys painting, working with pottery, and photography. I turned to art-making during a high stress time in my life and it helped me find balance. One of the texts that taught [...]
How to Support Your Black and Brown Friends During This Time
By Kayla White, M.A. Clinical Mental Health Counseling, Resident in Counseling Unless you’ve been living under a rock the past few years, you’re likely well aware of the rising tensions concerning the topic of race. It’s in large part due to the hateful and even violent statements/acts we’ve witnessed on the parts of white authoritative [...]
Self-care ideas!
By Kayla White, M.A. Clinical Mental Health Counseling, Resident in Counseling If you are anything like me, practicing self-care and self-love can often get placed on the back burner. Also, I am not a proclaimed morning person, so other than those things I NEED to do, I've learned they likely won't get done until I'm [...]
Working with Thoughts – Part 3
By Bruce Craig, MA, Resident in Counseling in Northern Virginia In the first couple of articles in this series we focused on noticing our emotions objectively and learning how to not be reactive to them. This is a constant lifelong practice that we can get better at over time and we should also remember [...]
How the Idea of “Breast is Best” is Hurting Caregivers
When caregivers are first embarking on their parenting journey, one of the primary questions they must often answer is whether they will choose to breastfeed their child. Breastfeeding has been shown to have a variety of benefits. Breastmilk is often discussed as nutritionally superior to formula, providing all of the nutrients necessary for the [...]
Three Tools to Calm a Stressed-Out Family
By Dr. Debra Rezendes, HMT Resident in Marriage and Family Therapy in Northern Virginia The last three months of 2020 has brought a wave of stress and anxiety for most families. While I share the sentiments of wanting to be whisked away to a secluded beach, our present circumstances allow us to be intentional about [...]
Learning to Notice Emotions Early and Objectively – Part 2
By Bruce Craig, Resident in Counseling in Northern Virginia Emotions are here for a reason and every human will feel the full range of emotions at one point or another in their lives. This is to say that emotions are not something we should be afraid of or try to avoid in any way. We [...]
Positive Impacts of Journaling
By Kayla White, M.A. Clinical Mental Health Counseling in Northern Virginia Journaling allows people to clarify their thoughts and feelings, thereby gaining valuable self-knowledge. It's also a good problem-solving tool; oftentimes, one can hash out a problem and come up with solutions more easily on paper. Here are some of the studied positive impacts of [...]
Taking Time to Pause
By Jackie Carrera, MSEd, Resident In Counseling in Northern Virginia We are in a time of uncertainty where some relationships have been strained due to a variety of stressors. For some it has been a time of thriving in being close to another, while for others it is a challenging time. We are always relating [...]
Working with Our Emotions – Part One
By Bruce Craig, Resident in Counseling in Northern Virginia Rawpixel.com/Adobe Stock Emotions can become overwhelming in the blink of an eye and it can sometimes feel like there is no way to prevent them from feeling insurmountable. It may seem like everywhere you turn someone is doing something that is mean, frustrating or disrespectful. Every [...]
Self-Compassion Break
Photo by Michelle on Unsplash By Dr. Debra Rezendes, HMT Resident in Marriage and Family Therapy in Northern Virginia For so many, the recent months have required a bit of flexibility. The pandemic has left many individuals, parents, and families juggling multiple roles. We are all trying to figure things out day by day. In moments of high [...]
Understanding the Teenage Brain
Photo by Melissa Askew on Unsplash By Dr. Debra Rezendes, HMT Resident in Marriage and Family Therapy in Northern Virginia Raising a teenager can be hard. There is so much social, emotional, and neurobiological change happening in such a short amount of time. Many of us can remember, rather vividly, what it felt like during this awkward and [...]
Navigating Uncharted Waters: COVID-19
By Dr. Debra Rezendes, HMT Resident in Marriage and Family Therapy We are in uncharted territory together as our community braces to contain the impact of COVID-19. Photo by Fusion Medical Animation on Unsplash As a parent, you have likely had to shape-shift into many forms this week—comforter, fear-slayer, information-gatherer, preparer, and more recently teacher. You have likely [...]
Three Calming Activities
To help anxious children (and you!) that can be done in the home! By Kayla White, M.A. Clinical Mental Health Counseling Photo by Caleb Woods on Unsplash These activities are great for children and adults to help them practice mindfulness, live in the here and now, and learn to reduce symptoms of anxiety. Progressive Muscle Relaxation: What is [...]
Protect Your Mental Health From the Dark Sides of Social Media
By Kayla White, M.A. Clinical Mental Health Counseling Photo by William Iven on Unsplash It's easier said than done to detox yourself from social media. It is everywhere and, if you are like most, you have the fear of missing out. But social media has many dark sides and it is in the best interest of your own [...]
Mindful Self Compassion
By Bruce Craig, Resident in Counseling Photo by Alisa Anton on Unsplash In the last couple of blog articles, we have covered how to begin tuning in to our mental process to begin noticing moment-to-moment what our mind is up to. As we tune into this process, it is likely you will notice some negative self-talk. These negative [...]
The Magic Ratio to a Happy, Healthy Relationship
By Dr. Debra Rezendes, HMT Resident in Marriage and Family Therapy Photo by Kristina Litvjak on Unsplash John Gottman, a well-known and well-respected couples researcher, has documented multiple differences between healthy and unhealthy relationships. Of these differences, healthy relationships, he suggests, have five times more positive interactions than negative interactions. Luckily, this means that we don’t have to [...]
Getting to the Heart of Communication
By Dr. Debra Rezendes, HMT Resident in Marriage and Family Therapy Photo by Jamez Picard on Unsplash Many couples seek out couples therapy because they are finding communication difficult. In the world of couples interventions, communication skills training and “I” statements are popular. While these skills may provide short-term gains, I often see them failing to provide the [...]
Noticing the Mental Process
By Bruce Craig, Resident in Counseling Pixabay Image Practicing Mindfulness in your daily life as often as possible can give us the power to become less reactive to thoughts and feelings. We can begin to intentionally notice what are mind is up to and begin to retrain it to operate in a more useful way. [...]
5 Ways For a Stress-Free Sleep
By Kayla White, M.A. Clinical Mental Health Counseling, Resident in Counseling Photo by Matthew T Rader on Unsplash We’ve all been there. You turn to look at the clock and it’s 2:00 am, then 3:00am. You have to get up in a few hours but, you are still wide awake with what feels like a million thoughts running [...]
New Year, New You?
Photo by Danil Aksenov on Unsplash By Dr. Debra Rezendes, HMT Resident in Marriage and Family Therapy As one year closes and another begins, it is natural to think of what we hope the journey ahead entails. Certainly, New Year's resolutions can be guide posts to help us stay on track towards big goals. But often, we tend [...]
Do The Next Right Thing
Photo by Dustin Belt on Unsplash By Alison Morogiello, MEd, NCC , Resident in Counseling Upon viewing the new “Frozen II” movie with my two young nieces, there was a mantra throughout the film that allowed the characters to move forward when things felt hopeless. “Do the next right thing”. Sometimes in life, we are faced with overwhelming [...]
The 5 Signs of Burnout
By Dr. Debra Rezendes, HMT Resident in Marriage and Family Therapy During the holidays, there can be a lot of emotional resources going out. One way that we can practice self-care is to recognize the signs of burnout and pull back when we feel like too much of ourselves is going into caring for others. [...]
Gut Microbes and Mental Health!
By Kayla White, M.A. Clinical Mental Health Counseling, Resident in Counseling Photo by Brandless on Unsplash It's no secret that mental health and the gut-brain membrane is a new, flourishing research area! One study found that Coprococcus seems to have a pathway related to dopamine, a key brain signal involved in depression, although they have no evidence how this [...]
Keeping Children Safe Online
By Dr. Debra Rezendes - Resident in Marriage and Family Therapy Photo by McKaela Lee on Unsplash One modern parenting challenge that I frequently hear about is how to keep kids and teens safe online. It can be hard to know how to keep children safe amidst the changing landscape of the online world. One certainty about the [...]
Supporting Families in the Fourth Trimester
By Dr. Debra Rezendes, HMT Resident in Marriage and Family Therapy Photo by Liane Metzler on Unsplash My social media feed has been bursting with pictures of mothers to be and new babies entering the world. I love the moment a family meets their little one. And, I also know from working with hundreds of mothers and families, [...]
Daily Mindfulness Practice Basics
By Bruce Craig, Resident in Counseling Photo by Simon Migaj on Unsplash A simple and effective way to cultivate a more calm and peaceful life is to take the time to notice the thoughts that lead to our feelings. Our brains are always thinking even if we are not tuned into our thoughts. These thoughts lead to feelings whether [...]
Play away Separation Anxiety
By Dr. Debra Rezendes, HMT Resident in Marriage and Family Therapy School is back in session, the season in which separation anxiety may rear itself. The good news is that separation anxiety is often normal, short lived, and can be an indication of the healthy and loving relationship with your young child. Separation Anxiety For [...]
Nighty Night
By Dr. Debra Rezendes, HMT Resident in Marriage and Family Therapy For many of us parents, the blissful summer days of sleeping in have been replaced by the early morning routines of the school year. As we trade the slower paced days of summer for the beginning of the school year, the natural transition of [...]
If we treat our body well, our mind will be happy too! 💗
Photo by Fezbot2000 on Unsplash By Alison Whitehouse, Resident in Counseling Research continues to support the connection between physical health and mental health. When we are sick with a cold, we often feel depressed or fatigued. When we are stressed or anxious, our body tenses up, or we may have digestive problems. Our mind and body are a [...]
Seeking Safety
Seeking Safety was designed for people with a history of trauma and/or addiction. Trauma means a distressing event such as a child abuse, major accident, combat, domestic violence, natural disaster, etc. Addiction means destructive use of alcohol, drugs, gambling, food, shopping, etc. It focuses on coping skills to help you become safer in your relationships, [...]
Choose Your Filter! Explaining CBT to Teens
By Alison Whitehouse, Resident in Counseling We all have what’s called “cognitive distortions” and “negative core beliefs”, that negatively shape how we think, feel, and act. How can we explain this to a teenager? Let’s use the metaphor of Instagram filters. On Instagram, you have a picture to upload and a list of filters in which to [...]